Again, I return to the land of Blog after a long absence….Cross your fingers that I can stick around this time! I’ve been living in a house of ill repute for the last week. (no…I’m not taking up prostitution just yet, although with the cost of Chilly’s medical bills, medicines and the price of apples, I am seriously considering it…more on how apples nearly caused my own heart attack in a moment….)
My house of ill repute is literally filled with the sick and infirm. All I can say is that it seriously sucks to care for your sick family when you are sick yourself. My son has the flu, (NOT H1N1, thank God!), Irish Dancer Girl has allergy and sinus issues, and Chilly is having some serious upper respiratory issues which are dangerous for him. Hopefully, he will not have to be hospitalized. I’m having some mild asthma and sinus issues myself and would really just like to NOT pee my panties every time I cough. All I can say is that I am not too proud to start wearing Depends at this point if it means I don’t have to change clothes every 30 seconds! (I know…TMI…sorry….I’m delirious….and don’t laugh, younger friends….you’ll be 40+ someday too!) Fortunately, after days of despair, we are on the mend and on to healthier times.
Back to the apples…
Chilly and I stopped at our local grocery store last week for a few items. Chilly picked up four Gala apples. We paid for our items and it occurs to me that our tab is a bit higher than I calculated. (Yes, I am that kind of shopper…I watch those receipts like a hawk.) I spot the crime immediately.
4 apples = $5.29.……Did ya catch that?
What the heck are these freakin’ apples made of? Some kind of edible gold? I actually started shrieking in the store (much to Chilly’s horror…) “ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? FIVE DOLLARS FOR FOUR APPLES??? THAT IS JUST PLAIN THIEVERY!!”
Poor Chilly scuttles to the exit as fast as he can because he knows I’m just getting started. I march back to the apple stand where I KNOW the sign for Gala apples said $1 per pound and sure enough, they are just that. Chilly insists that he purchased Galas. Upon closer inspection, I discover the problem. Chilly has purchased 4 Honeycrisp apples. Honeycrisps are the “shee-shee~pooh~pooh” Prada style apples of the apple world. They are $3 per pound!!
I can plainly see how Chilly was hoodwinked. Galas and Honeycrisp look almost identical. The day before when Chilly purchased his Gala apples he found them easily. The day of the crime, he went back to where he originally picked up the Galas. HOWEVER, the Galas had been moved to the opposite side of the aisle and were replaced with the Honeycrisp. SHAZAM! It was a bait and switch! Those produce managers are diabolical! Chilly does not have the shopping savvy that I possess so he was completely suckered in by that rotten trick.
I have a feeling that Snow White probably bit into a Honeycrisp and passed out when she found out how expensive they were. That’s probably the E True Hollywood version of her story. So, BUYER BEWARE!!! Watch out for the Honeycrisp Bait and Switch at your local market! And, is it just me or has the price of apple cider just gone completely sky high too?! Oy!
Well, my mad nursing skills are being summoned from various parts of my kingdom. More Halloween fun coming tomorrow!